I’ve always heard people say they have an “addictive” personality. This was never something I felt applied to me. I discovered recently, I think I was in denial. I do think I have an addictive personality. Over the past 9 months, I have really been working on getting healthy, which means changing lots of bad habits. To start with…coffee, alcohol, and entirely changing my eating habits.
I cut coffee out of my routine almost 2 months ago. It. was. not. easy. I still struggle every day with not having a cup of coffee, or a glass of wine for that matter. This is only one instance, but what I’m learning is this carries over into many other aspects of my life, including people.
I also can’t quit people. Everyone that knows me knows, that once you are important to me, you are ALWAYS important to me. This can be chalked up to one of my best qualities, and yet one of my worst. Things linger with me. People, linger with me.
This allows people to always have a foot in the door with me. I’m not one of those people that can just close that door and never think about it again. I often wonder how friends from my past are doing, whether I should or not. I have no ill intent, it’s just simply caring about those I have cared for previously. This can sometimes get me in trouble, by opening a door that should’ve been closed. Those relationships ended for a reason and don’t have a place in my current life, but sometimes I struggle navigating through those scenarios.
If I’ve let those relationship end it’s because they were obviously not a beneficial relationship for me to have.
How do I find a healthy balance of always caring, but still learning to let go?